Let’s talk about dogs

Dogs.

Now, I’ll throw my hat into the ring straight away and say I am a dog owner.

We have a 4.5 year old rescue black cockapoo. A handsome, exuberant, loving, anthropomorphic dog. He’s also demanding, teflonesque and requires a sturdy hand when near water and other dogs. He goes a bit bat shit crazy when he meets his favourite friends at the river. He is no longer a stylish gentleman poolside, he becomes a crazed, coked, water guy. Poodles are highly intelligent, hunting dogs and Cocker spaniels are retriever, water dogs.

Ok I hear you say, “why on earth did you two almost retired types who like nothing better than watching a re-run of Miss Marple accompanied by Lapsang souchoung, rescue a young full on dog”?

When I met my husband 30 years ago he was a dedicated cat man and I was an early convert but had been brought up with dogs, mainly feisty terriers. We had many cats together, all special, beautiful and hugely entertaining.

I was having ‘that’ repeated conversation with my niece and nephew as to how I wish I had a dog…. I looked up taking a breath from my tale of need and their faces said it all, in fact they did say it, “will you just do it and get a dog, (for gawd’s sake)! ”  The next day I started the dispiriting search online for a dog. Weeks of emails, phone calls, missing out and weeping over sad dogs in ‘jolly’ promo photos; I found her. A terrier cross. She spoke to me.

I didn’t get her.

No, I didn’t go back to shelters and start again. I cried a lot and thought well there you are you see, it will never happen for me………..

Two weeks later Blue Cross rang and said are you still interested in ‘Tinsel’? I know, she was found at Christmas time wandering alone in Exeter by the dog warden. Answering through yet more tears, yes please, when and where.

We went to pick her up with our hearts in our mouths. The girls brought her out from the kennels. She came tearing out, tugging on the lead and her eyes met ours and it was unconditional love. She was 9 yrs old. She didn’t behave as such and her command of us and other dogs 3 times her size was commendable to see.

We needed help

We still had at home our beloved cat, Phoebe, a snotty Empress, another adoptee.  So what do you do when you have a rescue terrier, behaviour unknown, historically known to chase cats and a cat that takes no shit from anyone but is small?

You get an animal behaviourist and trained dog whisperer from Buckfastleigh, of course. She met with us at home. She must of seen two freaked looking people, wide eyed from little sleep, eyes darting around the room to see if the cat and dog were in the room together. Our first night with the dog was bad. I’d built a beautiful den for her in the dining room made out of velvet curtains and endless pillows, sure she wouldn’t get out; 5 mins into the night 3 of us in the bed, my husband, Phoebe and I all looked at each other appalled as ‘Tinsel’ body slammed the door and howled like a banshee. We spent that night in rota on the floor in the dining room. My husband doing the final shift waking up with his head under the dining room table and Tinsel looking on delighted with herself.

We needed help. Elaine our saviour, kind and calm took us through various strategies as to how to slowly get cat and dog to accept each other. Some from the old school say let them sort it out, a few mashups and all will be well. Phoebe told me in no uncertain terms if we did that, she’d leave. I felt very guilty that I had blown Phoebe’s world apart. She spent a lot of time in the first months looking at me and T like we were some smelly deposit on her paw.

Nobody tells you getting a rescue dog is such a huge responsibility and that your life stops being your own, immediately. At times I felt overwhelmed by the commitment and by my loss of freedom. We don’t have children so I suppose you could say we are a bit selfish and used to our own time. T changed all that. She very quickly tore my heart open and I felt like I had met my dog soul mate. Walking down Totnes high street I was thinking about her awful name and how I needed to keep the T sound so she wouldn’t be traumatised, again, and I thought ‘Tuppence’ as in Tommy & Tuppence. Perfect.

When I told my good friend in Scotland she burst out laughing. Tuppence in Scotland is euphemism for your lady garden. Oh well….. The strategies we used to acclimatise the animals were long and varied. Many of our friends found it a hilarious and fine sport to see our remodelling of the house and our lives.  We got there. My goal was to be able to lie on the bed with both animals. It took 2 years. When Tuppence died the pain was fierce and lengthy. My first thought the next morning was I have to leave this house and I will never have another dog.

Wrong.

I’m still in the house and Teddy burst into our lives nearly 2 years ago. He came from Ferne Animal Sanctuary. He was loved but had had to be given up and was in the shelter for only a week. By this stage darling Phoebe had gone and so no integration strategies were needed, not for the animals anyway! He came into our home and our hearts and we looked at each other and thought wow, what have we done? When I first met Teddy he sat on a sofa with me and leaned back onto me, he was warm and heavy and I felt I must take him into our lives.

He is a very loving dog, very good looking, my sister in the US calls him Count Astrakhan. His dependence on us is 100% and he requires lots of exercise and attention. Our dog walker is a saint on two legs. She has got him to calm down, behave with other dogs and generally be a good boy. He is the third leg of our tripod.

The world of dogs in Totnes and indeed wherever you go is quite extraordinary. Since Covid, dogs have exploded into our lives and yes our dog is probably a Covid pup too, he’s the right age and breed, curly and cute. If you can call a big black dog ‘cute’. He’s well behaved in cafes, he needs to be, as we go to them a lot. He’s not so good with other dogs coming up into his face. Sitting outside at The Curator, The Bull and The Green Table can be interesting and loud. He has the loudest bark in Devonshire. My nephew who is a seasoned dog owner and I’m sure thinks we’re absolute wimps when it comes to discipline said ‘Jesus, that’s one loud bark’. Teddy did not bark for 2 weeks when he first arrived. It is a known phenomenon that adopted dogs keep on their best behaviour for about 2 weeks, trying to settle and fit in and then they let it all out. This can be a real problem for the rescue centres, inexperienced owners returning the dogs after a few weeks because they are alarmed or confused by different behaviours.

Covid caused other issues in the dog world. These sweet dogs who were given lots of attention and cosseting from the families all day every day because everyone was WFH suddenly found themselves alone for hours, then taken out on short walks around lots of other dogs they hadn’t really had to socialise with before. The veterinarians cite their biggest health problems are behavioural. The rescue centres have lots of dogs and so do the puppy farms. Do we have the space for all these dogs in our towns and in some cases 2 dogs + 1 owner?

Some people object to a dog’s bum pointing at them whilst they drink their coffee. Not everyone loves dogs.

I do love dogs. I also like my own space. I no longer try to bring the big fella with me everywhere, especially into town. I find it a bit stressful and awkward. I have shop owner friends who get really pissed off with dog pee all over their shop fronts. Maybe we could train our dogs to wee in the gutter?

Dogs are big business. Their clothes, their treats, their mental health. I sometimes think they must look at us, their humans, and think ‘what suckers’.

Teddy like Tuppence keeps me from turning into a grouchy isolated person (maybe I need to check that statement with my man), a much fitter person and blessed by walking with him in the most beautiful Devon surroundings.

That’s got to be good for the soul.